On New Year's Eve at midnight while most people were toasting 2011, my ex-husband, Don, found out that his boat was sinking. He keeps it on the Mississippi River tied up in Red Wing because the water doesn't freeze. This was very bad news because he lives on his boat during the spring, summer, and fall. I told him not to name the boat the Edmund Fitzgerald II. I'm just kidding the boat's real name is Magic Shop, which I don't understand since I've never seen it levitate or pull a rabbitt out of its hatch. But getting back to the emergency. Don threw on his warm clothes, grabbed his rubber boots and rushed out the door in the dark and cold of night. I felt helpless because I didn't know what to do. I offered to come along and sing "My Heart Will Go On" but he said that would make a bad situation ten times worse! I didn't hear from him for a day then he called and said the port side was under water. All the snow and ice we've had this winter caused that side of the boat to sink. That is the side with the bathroom (sorry the correct nautical term is the head). Also one of the berths (sleeping quarters) was flooded. That is where he stored a lot of stuff. I didn't hear any news again until he called to say that he was using two pumps, but he wasn't making much headway (bathroom way) until a friend Ted Johnson brought a third pump. With the third pump he was able to stablize the boat! Then he had to try to dry out the inside with heaters. Now that the boat is saved I think I should finally sing "My Heart Will Go On." Hey where is everyone running off to?