I just saw a doctor on TV talking about the importance of early childhood nutrition and how it can affect your health for the rest of your life. That probably means that when my children were babies, I shouldn’t have given them strained donuts for breakfast every day! I was already feeling guilty when my granddaughter came home from school and started talking about what she learned in health class that day.
"Grandma have you heard of the Food Pyramid?"
"Of course it’s in Egypt."
"No that’s not right."
"I’m pretty sure it is. King Tut was buried there. It’s called the Food Pyramid because he and his servants were buried with a 5 foot sub so they could party in the afterlife."
“Grandma that’s not right. Here’s a picture of the Food Pyramid.”
“He was buried in the bread section on the bottom.”
“No this is a guideline for healthy eating. We’re not eating enough fruit.”
“How can you say that? I just ate some craisons.”
“We need to eat 2-4 servings of fruit each day!”
“Well you know how I feel about fresh fruit.”
“Please don’t start talking about The Great Peach Disaster of 1989!”
“The year was 1989. I was driving by a produce stand when I saw a sign for fresh peaches. I stopped and they gave me a sample. They were most delicious juicy peaches I have ever eaten. Even though they were expensive I bought a bag. The next day I was looking forward to eating one when I discovered they were all rotten. I was so upset I ran outside and shook my fist at the sky and screamed, ‘As God is my witness. I will never buy fresh fruit again!’”
“But fresh fruit is healthy. You want me to be healthy don’t you?”
“Of course I do. I have a plan. Grab that gallon of water and let’s go to the store.”
An hour later we were sitting in my minivan with a bag full of strawberries, peaches, pears, blueberries, and apples.
“I’m going to start washing this fruit and then we’ll eat it all.”
“What we have to eat all this fruit right now in the van?”
“The minute we left the store the fruit’s internal clock started ticking. All the fruit is rotting even now while I’m talking. Start eating!”
I had just finished the last apple when I started to get cramps. I wasn’t feeling good. I looked at my granddaughter and she looked pale.
“Grandma I feel sick!”
“The store has a bathroom. Run back to the store. Let’s go!”
When we finally made it back to my van, my granddaughter said, “Well that was a disaster!”
"How can you say that. We got all our required weekly fruit and exercise in one day. I call that a win-win situation!"
"Grandma have you heard of the Food Pyramid?"
"Of course it’s in Egypt."
"No that’s not right."
"I’m pretty sure it is. King Tut was buried there. It’s called the Food Pyramid because he and his servants were buried with a 5 foot sub so they could party in the afterlife."
“Grandma that’s not right. Here’s a picture of the Food Pyramid.”
“He was buried in the bread section on the bottom.”
“No this is a guideline for healthy eating. We’re not eating enough fruit.”
“How can you say that? I just ate some craisons.”
“We need to eat 2-4 servings of fruit each day!”
“Well you know how I feel about fresh fruit.”
“Please don’t start talking about The Great Peach Disaster of 1989!”
“The year was 1989. I was driving by a produce stand when I saw a sign for fresh peaches. I stopped and they gave me a sample. They were most delicious juicy peaches I have ever eaten. Even though they were expensive I bought a bag. The next day I was looking forward to eating one when I discovered they were all rotten. I was so upset I ran outside and shook my fist at the sky and screamed, ‘As God is my witness. I will never buy fresh fruit again!’”
“But fresh fruit is healthy. You want me to be healthy don’t you?”
“Of course I do. I have a plan. Grab that gallon of water and let’s go to the store.”
An hour later we were sitting in my minivan with a bag full of strawberries, peaches, pears, blueberries, and apples.
“I’m going to start washing this fruit and then we’ll eat it all.”
“What we have to eat all this fruit right now in the van?”
“The minute we left the store the fruit’s internal clock started ticking. All the fruit is rotting even now while I’m talking. Start eating!”
I had just finished the last apple when I started to get cramps. I wasn’t feeling good. I looked at my granddaughter and she looked pale.
“Grandma I feel sick!”
“The store has a bathroom. Run back to the store. Let’s go!”
When we finally made it back to my van, my granddaughter said, “Well that was a disaster!”
"How can you say that. We got all our required weekly fruit and exercise in one day. I call that a win-win situation!"
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